Friday, January 28, 2011

January Favorites!

This is my favorite part of the month! I love reading "Favorites" entries! 
They are so much fun.
Although the month isn't over, early next week will be a tad busy for me, so I decided to go ahead & show y'all. 


I'm sorry. 
He's not going away for me any time soon. 
I have listen to his music every. single. time. my vehicle has been cranked since around 4 weeks ago. 
I'm hopelessly in love. 

Not only OPI, just polish in general, but OPI has my attention this week. 
Their names for polishes are so unique & cute, and they have the most amazing colors. 
I love the formula, and I love the quality. 

with that being said, this is my favorite color right now. It's from the Katy Perry Collection. 
The name? "Teenage Dream". 
How original, Katy. Good job. 
I haven't always been a fan of glittery polishes, but this collection won me over, and other brands (aside from OPI) seem to chip really quickly, but these glitters are packed so thinly that I have faith that it won't be as bad. [maybe].

Ok, remember my comment about my Chi serum? 
Yeah, well, this little guy has found his way up to the SAME position as my Chi.
 I will say that Chi still holds number one because I am infatuated with its smell (this smells like fruit, and i'm not sure how I feel about running around with my hair smelling like a can of mandarins.) 
Since my "New Years Resolution" was to not straighten my hair [as much], I just went all out & decided not to straighten it at all, so this really calms down the lion mane once I dry it, and it doesn't make my hair feel heavy at all.

Was this a favorite last month?
 I've got to stop.
 I need rehab.

I am not a huge perfume person. 
I usually only keep one & don't get another until it's been empty for a week, but I got a wild hair for some new perfume, and this one was my favorite. I smelled a few, got a headache, found this one, and bam. Bought it & left. I love it when that happens.

I was given a candle for Christmas, and the scent is "Creme Brulee". 
I love sweet smells like that for fall/winter-time. 

Sound gross? Try it. 
It taste like the Mint Green Orbit. (I can't think of the name).
It last forever, and it's not like chewing a Hershey chocolate chip because if it was, I wouldn't like it either. Who wants to CHEW chocolate for longer than 10 seconds? Not this female.

This is EOS lip balm. 
Alone it sells for 23.00 (in select places).
I got these 3 scents (Sweet Mint, Honeysuckle Honeydew, & Pomegranate Rasberry) for 9.99 on Amazon. Click here to get it yourself! Love. Love. Love. 
I keep one in my car and one by my bed. The other? I'm savoring!

Ok, this is not a favorite -- yet! 
I am definitely listening to these guys daily as of the past week.
They are so great with lyrics, and I love their style of music.
So, we'll say this is a "potential favorite"

If you do a favorites post, please comment with your blog link so I can check it out! I'd love to see what you're enjoying! 

Monday, January 24, 2011

Music Monday.

 I don't really have a certain topic for my blog today, but I have been doing some heavy writing here lately, so I decided to just share my current playlist with you.
 I try to keep 10 songs under "mylist" on my iPod, but I can't get enough of these 15 songs, so consider this a bonus?
Yay for bonuses?
High five!
Anyway, I'll post them for you, along with my favorite lyrics from each.

Tell Me I'm A Wreck, Every Avenue
"When you tell me I'm a wreck, you say that I'm a mess, how could you expect anything less? You latched onto me, then cried that I strung you along." 

Grenade, Bruno Mars
"If my body was on fire, you'd watch it burn down in flames. You said you loved me. You're a liar 'cus you never, ever did."

Little Miss, Sugarland
"Little miss checkered dress, little miss one big mess, little miss i'll take less when I always give so much more. It's alright, it's alright, it's alright. Sometimes you gotta lose 'til you win."

Heartbeat, The CO & Tyler Ward
"I don't wanna leave this heart alone. I just wanna go wherever you go. I just wanna come back, pick it up - it's love that we're fightin' for."

What She's Doing Now, Garth Brooks
"There's somethin' about this time of year that spins my head around, takes me back, makes me wonder what she's doin' now."
"Just for laughs, I picked up the phone & dialed her old number; no one knew her name. I hung up the phone and sat there & wondered if she'd ever done the same."

Guinevere, Eli Young Band
"She carries memories around like souveniers down in her pockets. She shoulda let some go by now but came seem to drop it. Says forgiveness ain't nothin' but a lifeless tire on the shoulder of her soul that never rolls."

Kiss Goodbye, Little Big Town
"When you lose someone the first thing that goes through your head is if you run fast enough, you just might catch up, but it don't work like that. You just gotta watch them fly, stand there in the spotlight. You wanna swallow up your pride, you know it's gonna be alright. Wish it well & close your eyes with a kiss goodbye."

Best I'll Ever Be, Sister Hazel
"So I wait and I wait, and I run old scenes through my tired head of the days we laid by the school and said 'forever'. Is that the best I'll ever be? I miss you. I miss talkin' all night long with you, and I need this to find a way to your home. My love, can you hear me?"

Beaches of Cheyanne, Garth Brooks
"They say she just went crazy, screamin' out his name. She ran out into the ocean, and to this day they claim: if you go down by the water, you'll see her footprints in the sand 'cause every night she walks the beaches of Cheyanne."

She (For Liz), Parachute
"How can only thing that's killin' me make me feel so alive? I couldn't speak. I couldn't breathe to save my life. All of my chances swim like sinkin' ships. This time is it."

Heaven, Warrent
"The memories are gray, but man, they sure are comin' back. I don't need to be the king of the world, just as long as i'm the hero to this little girl."

Secrets, One Republic
"Amazing that we got this far, it's like we're chasin' all those stars."

Kiss Me When I'm Down, Gary Allan
"It's been a year since last weekend when you swung by."

Angels on the Moon, Thriving Ivory
"Don't tell me if i'm dying, 'cus I don't wanna know. If I can't see the sun, then maybe I should go. Don't wake me 'cus I'm dreaming of angels on the moon where everyone you know never leaves too soon."

Right on Back to You, Keith Urban
"I don't know where i'd be without you. I guess I get scared, and that's why I act like such a fool 'cus you're the one thing I can't lose. I feel the tears comin, and I wanna cry. I think of us, and all the love comes shinin' through. It always leads me righ on back to you."

Happy Monday, friends. 

Friday, January 21, 2011

if not for those i've loved along the way..

A lot weighing in on my mind today, but the main thing would have to be understanding just how precious life really is, and just how often we take people for granted.

Looking back on people I've loved throughout my lifetime makes me wish I had done things differently sometimes. Of course, when we're younger we're always "on the go", and as I "age" a little more - I find myself trying to grasp at most any opportunities to spend time with the people I love.

Today I went through every Facebook message that I had sent since 2006, and I realized just how much things change in only 4-5 years. Friends change, people change, relationships change, life just changes. It's not always an "all-the-sudden" thing. Sometimes, it's a gradual change in character. Other times, it IS sudden.

My fondest memories of people who have made Heaven their home are a tad foggy, but I try my best to keep them in a corner of my mind. I don't want to lose a single ounce of memory that involves those precious people.

I can feel the wind in my face as we raced down the gravel road with no destination in mind, but I always felt so alive and free, yet safe & sound when I was with you. You would let me guide the four-wheeler all around, and you always made me laugh. I have so many memories of fishing with my daddy, ones that I'll never forget, but your fishing trips are also unforgettable. I could be downright discouraged, and you would give me a little push to keep on fishing. "There's a joe-darter right there..just wait", you'd say. I think I spent most of my summer's on the pier with you, and I wish we could fish one more time. You meant (and still mean) so much to me and your family. Your legacy lives on in the lives of my brother, my three cousins, and your children. You showed us all how to love the outdoors with our whole hearts. Your laugh was contagious, and it filled the entire room. People couldn't help but smile if they heard it, and the same goes for your tales of hunting.

I always loved coming to your house and exploring through your jewelry. You definitely had an eye for uniqueness. Your love for America astounded me. I wish I could share so many things with you. Like, for instance, how I now find myself looking for unique things. My friends even sometimes say, "it's very's you." I like to believe you had a take on that. I'd like to share with you how I am in love with America. I can remember swinging on your side porch and the crystal bowl of candy you kept in your living room. I loved your back yard, and I remember helping with your garden. You were such a sweet & gentle woman, but your beliefs were stern & strong. You didn't let anyone talk you out of believing in something, and I loved that about you also.

I wish I could remember more about my time spent with you. I know that from what I'm told we are the exact same person. People who knew you & know me always say that. Peanut butter & jelly sandwiches were only good at your house, and coming to your home in the country was always a joy for me. Your house had a distinct smell, and I can be anywhere today - smell that particular smell, and I automatically think of you. About a year ago, we went through many of your things & I found so many pieces of yours that I fell in love with. You were also a unique person, and you were so strong willed. You raised my most favorite man in the whole entire world, my number one man, and you raised him to treat people with his upmost respect. You showed him strength that he has displayed for my family well - especially over the last few years. You taught him that doing things for others is the only way to live, and I can't thank you enough for that.

These are just a few people who have touched my life. I know this was a heavy post to read.

Take advantage of the time you're given to spend with the people you care about. Remember those times, and don't take one single second for granted.


I remember waitin’ by the curb with Mr. Murphy
When daddy picked me up from school his eyes were red
We drove to the hospital in a hurry
Where my family gathered round my Grandpa’s bed
He was my best friend
He taught me how to fish
And I cried listenin to my daddy pray
For one of those I’ve loved along the way

She had a ribbon in her hair the day I met her
That whole next year we couldn’t get enough
And after graduation she took off for Denver
And for awhile we both tried to keep in touch
She was my best friend
And it broke my heart
But I don’t regret the day that she became
One of those I’ve loved along the way

And I hope they know
I never woulda made it this far on my own
Where would we all be without those
Fathers and mothers, sisters and brothers
The friends I’ve made, the long lost lovers
I wouldn’t be who I am today
If not for those I’ve loved along the way
Along the way

Now I’m just a country boy with a guitar
Lookin’ back down this old road I’ve been travelin’ on
It was never about tryin’ to be some big star
For me it’s always been about these songs
You see they’re my best friends
They’re the life I live
And I hope they put a smile on the face
Of those that I’ve loved along the way
‘Cause I wouldn’t be the man I am today
If not for those I’ve loved along the way

-Those I've Loved, Eric Church

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

firsts, lasts, deer, cats, & upcoming tasks...

There's no doubt in ya'll's mind that I have a love affair with the outdoors, right?

So, when I tell you that, "this week (particularly today) just might be the most depressing day of the year" you'll understand why, right?

Does that clear it up for those of you who were confused?

You're welcome. :)

I feel like I cheated myself this season. I didn't take full advantage of huntin' like I would most of the time. There seemed to always be a reason why I wasn't going although my reasons only ever made sense to me: Matt wasn't going to be close incase I ended up needing help loading a deer, Daddy was working or decided to go somewhere I didn't want to go, I was tired, it was cold, I had "things to do".. etc, etc. 
Well, this weekend I just sucked it up & decided amongst myself that I was going regardless of who was doing what. I went every day from Thursday 'til today.
I honestly go through a slight depression era at the end of rifle season, and it sparks back up around June.  I can usually keep myself occupied until September to go dove huntin', but it's a challenge. The good thing about this era is that it ends sooner now since I'm bow huntin'. That starts up in October here, for all you non-Mississippi readers!

(glasgow, montana, 2010)

Sunday I got a fairly early start considering my habits for being fashionably late for everything (including huntin' most of the time, can you even BE fashionably late for huntin'? Anyway..) I chose to sit in a stand that I don't normally sit in, just to see what was going on down there. There is one lane and a box house at one end. 
(this is the lane, box stand beside me..minus Marlee, of course)

I sat there for around 2 hours, and I saw 2 deer. The deer were in no mood to stop & graze, though. They simply walked out, checked to see if they were seen, and walked back into the other  side of the lane. I love watching them & they have no idea :) So, later... I decided that I would have no chance to shoot one if they were moving through there so quickly.

(first bow kill)

I relocated back to "MY" stand. I feel at home there. I know the trees that "turn into deer" at a certain time of the evening, right before dark (I have a problem with that..hallucinating that there is a deer at one end of the field when really - it's a stump or tree limb that has been there for 45,676,402 years.) Anyway, once I got settled I looked down my right lane (it was 5:20). Something, I didn't know what, but something was creeping towards me. I was unsure of what it was (but I was VERY sure that it wasn't a person..just so you know), I just knew it was an animal that didn't belong (alive, anyway) in my field. 

So, I shot it.  

Now you're thinking I am an irresponsible hunter, right? One who doesn't fully think through what she's doing with an automatic rifle? Well, you're wrong. First of all, I had a gut feeling that I knew exactly what it was by its slyness and the way it walked towards me. Secondly, when your very worst fear is (aside from clowns) a coyote... and something walking on 4 legs is headed your direction -- you would do the same. Plus, I had been seeing a bobcat in that area for a few days. Excited, I left my stand to check it out, and in fact - it was a bobcat! My first bobcat! I was just as thrilled as I would have been if you told me I had killed the Boone & Crockett record. 

Yeah, that was pushing my excitement a little. But nevertheless, I was excited. :)

Monday, I went back. I vetoed going to the "new" stand, and I just went to mine. I knew I'd end up there anyway, so I waited until around 5:20 (again), and here comes little teenage doe! Well, I whacked her too, and without assistance I loaded her onto the back of the four-wheeler. I was quite proud of myself for not needing to call in backup! My dilemma? I drive a Honda Pilot now. Incase you didn't know, they have no room for bleeding animals in the trunk. My other dilemma? I drove my Honda Pilot to hunt. My next dilemma? My daddy was hunting in a different county & Matt was at home.

Lucky for me I had a volunteer to go with me to get my deer & take Daddy's (eight point) to the processor, help me unload it then load mine & unload it again. I also had help cleaning it, not that my Daddy wouldn't help me, but anyway. I could do it alone, but I'd rather have someone out there to critique me. As it turned out, I didn't need critiquing Monday, I just skinned the deer and the rest of the time I held the rack steady. I also had help learning that my little teenage doe was, in fact, a little teenage BUCK. Oops. In my defense, his antlers had not broken the skin, and either way -- "my help" told me that they would have shot him too. My daddy said the same thing, and I feel no remorse about it. :) 

It must be all of this "end-of-the-year excitement" that's got my brain shifting gears. The year as a whole (hunting wise) has been unforgettable. I won't ever forget these times i've spent with my daddy. I've experienced a few firsts this year, and I am so grateful for that. I thank God for allowing me to have the opportunity to hunt the outdoors. It is truly a privilege.  


I wanted to let you all know that I am going to start doing monthly favorites at the end of each month, and when I post one you can comment on the entry with a link to your blog if you want to participate! I think it will be fun to see what we've been enjoying each month. This can include anything you like: clothes, food, hair products, makeup, movies, books, websites, photos, other blogs, whatever you have discovered or been drawn to during that month. I hope you will all take part. I love seeing what everyone is interested in! 

Saturday, January 15, 2011

falling in love...with words.

I am a lover of words. Truly, I am. I enjoy blogging for that very reason. My love for words far exceeds any words that I could ever say, though. I oftentimes get "in trouble" with my friends when they have me listen to new music because I don't listen to the beat or "music" of the song at all - the first time is always about the lyrics for me. The same thing goes for when I make them listen to a new song, I basically demand that they hear the lyrics & what the song is actually trying to say. If they aren't listening, we simply start the song over until they "convince" me that they've heard the words. :) I know, I'm a terrible friend/person. The truth is, they probably really have me fooled most of the time!
 During my high school career, I kept notebooks full of "collages" of words. Quotes, lyrics, phrases, excerpts from speeches, things people said, text messages, anything that caught my eye & made me think or related to me at that present time was on a sheet of paper squiggled into the collage.
 On the first day of my Senior year, we walked in to our English class, sat down, and our teacher began to speak abut her expectations for the year. She told us that she wanted us to "fall in love with words". At first, I thought that was completely impossible because there is no way to fall in love with a word, and words can only mean so much said by some people. Right? Right.
Glad we agree.
 The thing is, there have been many times through the last few years of my life when I wanted to fall in love with words that a person has said to me, believing they are true, injecting me with hope, taking them for all that they are and mean, analyze them to the core & be right about the outcome, but in reality -- sometimes those words leave us heartbroken, empty, and feeling alone. Sometimes words are built up to mean so much more than they actually do, and you are left to heal yourself, to fix yourself, to un-break yourself. It's sad, really, that such beautiful words can be broken down to nothing in our age in time, but it is happening.
 Now that my teacher said that to me, I am still understanding what "loving words" is truly about. I love words for the same reason that I hate them, if that makes any sense. Words give me hope. They allow me to believe. They inject me with hope. I take them for all they they are & mean, and I analyze them to the core. I long to be right about the outcome of most words said to me, especially coming from the mouthes of the folks who speak them.
 I don't believe we should love ALL words. I think that loving them is something you have to train yourself to do. You don't love words spoken by people who speak poorly of you or the things you believe in or stand behind. You don't love words people use in vulgar or offensive ways, but if you understand what my teacher meant about "falling in love with words", you will more than likely know which words to love - and which ones to leave alone.

Monday, January 10, 2011

new blogger, youtube, tornados, and tv shows.

First of all, I should apologize for not posting a DISCLAIMER on my last entry. I looked horrid, no makeup, wild hair, crazy attire, and you weren't even warned. Welcome to my life. Oops. So, sorry - better late than never, right? On the other hand, maybe I shouldn't have apologize because that's me on a fairly regular basis. Hm...

Okay. Whatever. Onward.

I have been trying to convince a young grasshopper that I know, also one of my best friends, to enter the blogging world. She & I read an UNREAL amount of blogs on a daily basis, and while I've been blogging around 4 years, she has resisted the pressure that I've put on her. That is, ...until now!! So, without further words on this small upgrade in the world -- go check out Hollie's blog! Leave her an encouraging comment! ;)

If you are wondering about all these random photos of the country, these were taken the day after the tornado I mentioned in my 2010 Recap, and I forgot I had taken them. Oops! 
I really didn't even capture the seriousness of the storms repercussions. In some places it was completely devastating to see.
The sky (on the other hand) was phenomenal on Saturday. I "forced" Megan to ride around with me while I harassed the damaged areas that had been affected (effected??) by the storm. *THANKS, BEST FRIEND!! =)

I used to be really firm in the belief that Google could answer all of my questions about anything! I still believe that it provides helpful information, and I am ALWAYS googling something (which usually leads to me Amazon-ing it), but lately I have been investigating products, movies, books, etc, on YOUTUBE. I love hearing other peoples opinions on things, and that makes it really easy. 

Is anyone watching the Bachelor? I'm not sure how I feel about Brad, but I will say that my favorite girl is Emily. She is so genuine & sweet, but Brad seems a tad bit sketchy to me. The way he says "Hello" bothers me too, and he always acts OVERLY concerned about each girl. I don't know. Maybe it's too early for me to form a true opinion, but as of right now - I think he's putting on a show. He SEEMS to be sincere, but I kind of feel like he's trying too hard to BE sincere & it's resulting in ... fake. 
In that same sense, I think these girls should chill out over the fact that he didn't pick anyone on the last season he had because 1.) at least he has some boundaries for himself 2.) everyone has made mistakes of their own in the past; they just may not be publicly displayed on tv. tres.) that's 3 in Spanish. Only one person will understand that, and they will more than likely never read this. 
And why am I concerned about Brad the Bachelor? Because I have nothing else to be concerned about tonight. Really. 

Class resumes tomorrow at 11. I will be the first to say that one day & a half of a morning out of school spoiled me; especially considering the fact that we JUST started back to class last Wednesday, and it wouldn't even qualify as a TRUE class period. Except for Bio2, but that was to be expected. 

Last - but MOST definitely not least .. My main man Garth has been serenading me at home during this "snowed in" holiday we've had for the last few days. I fell asleep with his playlist going on my computer last night, and when I woke up this morning I had a sudden urge to dance. That's totally normal at 9am, right? Well, when you listen to Garth -- anything is possible. :)

Have a good night and drive safe tomorrow!

Sunday, January 9, 2011



our entire town shuts COMPLETELY down at the sign of snow, but
today was forcasted to be a little different because ice was to be involved.

I, myself, am not a huge fan of ice due to the last experience I had with it. It was around Christmastime when I was 7 or 8 years old, and we (Mom, Hollie, & I) were watching a Christmas movie - Jingle All the Way - when the phone rang.

Mom answered it. Daddy & Matt were off hunting. She spoke with the lady for a minute, and then asked her to hold on for a moment while she went to the office to check out some paperwork for her. She left Hollie & I in the back content with a movie. 

In the midst of her being gone, the phone was off the hook & the movie still played when out of no where a limb flies through the "dining room" window sending Carolers through the air slamming against the floor. 

I took one look at the limb that had made itself right at home inside MY home, and I ran towards the office, only to be greeted by the same running method from Mom. She heard the commotion through the phone, and headed back in our direction. 

Full panic took on then, and we turned the light on in the viewing room to see caskets strowed out across the floor, and a gigantic oak tree sleeping soundly inside my home. Upstairs in Matt's room there stood a gaping hole. 

All I remember about it, really, is that I screamed "CALL 911" for a good thirty minutes until Mom reassured me that no one was hurt or dying, and then I just wanted my Daddy. For some reason I thought that maybe if he was home, the hole in my home would go away. 

Cell phones were a tad unheard of at this point, but the news of this newfound growth in our home was spreading like wildfire, and soon I was taken to Hollie's for the evening while our church came to help seal up the holes. 

I hated every form of weather other than sunshine for awhile after that. I didn't sleep good for a while after that, either. I have a vivid memory of the branch piercing through the window and sending one of my Mom's favorite decorations to the floor. Do you know that none of those Carolers were damaged? Sure, the labrador has a chipped ear, but none of them broke into a million pieces or shattered to the point of no return. 

And tonight, the "Ice Storm/Blizzard/Snowlacoust/Iceapocalypse" whatever you may call it - has proved to me that not all forms of cold are bad. 
Tonight has been fun.

Mom & I baked cookies at 9:00 which is rare because normally she's been in bed for 3 hours by 9, ha! :) Love you, Mom.

Daddy came up with a hot chocolate recipe. Ya'll have to try it! It's SO good!

Fill your cup with milk
Place Half of a HERSHEY COOKIES AND CREAM candy bar in the milk
Heat the milk up until candy is melted
Add 1 bag of instant hot chocolate
Add other half of candy bar
Heat until the candy is melted
Stir again,
and enjoy!


Later, I went to Hollie's on my 4wheeler. 
Top left to right: 
Cary (neighbor), Anna (Hollie's sibling), Hollie, Me, Steven (Anna's twin) & Leigh Kathryn in the front.

We had a block party that involved snowball fighting, hiding behind bushes, bruises, chasing each other down the street, lots of yelling, tons of laughing, and not taking heed to the fact that we're 18-19 years old here. 

We were children tonight.

Snow brings out the inner child in us, and that's okay because snow doesn't happen too often around here. 

We have to take advantage of these things while they last!

Tonight made me wish that I had gone sledding with Randi Jo & Trevor in Montana.
...Maybe next time? Ha!

Then I "drove" home.

I hate it when snow melts.
It feels like Christmas afternoon when you sit down & realize that all you've waited for (or prepared for in this case) is over. 
It's so depressing.
It's been fun.
That is all.

(maybe) the most important news: Class is canceled tomorrow. Thank you, snow. Thank you, living in the South. Thank you, Lord!


THAT is all.

Saturday, January 8, 2011

with that being said...

It always seems to fly by, from the moment I'm with you until the time I leave - time never seems to last long enough. We could spend days on end together, but each moment is instilled in my memory as if we had only been together for a few seconds. Your smile holds a place in my mind that I can recall so vividly whenever I want, and your laugh echoes through my ears as I replay the times we've spent together. You're no ordinary person to me, but to everyone else you're a typical being. You far surpass any individual I've ever met, but through another's eyes you couldn't be more "normal".
I can remember the night I realized that this beautiful mess was entirely more than I had ever bargained for. The lightening bugs lit up the summer sky like lanterns flowing in the July breeze. The stars shone as bright as candles swaying through the blackest of night. There were no love songs serenading in the background, but the crickets hushed the silence as they sang away like they do in the South. Resisting the "want" to be in your presence was becoming harder & harder for me, and you knew it. I wanted to be around you. I wanted to hear your voice. I wanted to see what you had to say. As bad as it sounds, I had given up trying so hard to pretend like I didn't care about you. It was evident.
You are the one & only person who has me figured out beyond questions. Sometimes it is unbelievable how transparent I seem to be around you because whether or not you'd ever say it - you know me like the hairs on the back of your hand. You can look at me & tell something's wrong, and if you're listening to my voice - you can decipher my mood just by listening to my tone. This trait hasn't ever bothered me about you. I like doing the most random things that can be thought of, and I like for them to be unplanned. I like that you know that about me, and you usually surprise me by what you can come up with.
Long were the days when you'd pick me up and take me down roads i'd never traveled before. Your sense of direction is, and always will be, better than mine. Conversation never ran dry, and when it subsided for a minute - the music on the radio got louder as we sang the night away. I couldn't imagine life any other way. I liked the feeling of my voice harmonizing with yours. I've always been thrilled to hear you sing. I was right where I wanted to be. Everything in my life at that moment was content. I was happy.
It's funny how life changes in only a few years, and looking back it's easy to see that some things will never be relived with the same feelings that were once felt, but have you ever been somewhere that brought back a feeling you once had? So many places do that to me, and they reach down to the pit of my stomach and raise the uttermost emotions that I keep locked inside. Have you ever smelled honeysuckle, and it took you back to a late summer night with a full moon shining above you casting shadows on your face? It causes me to go back to the very moment when love has been felt the most in my life. Has a song ever been the cue for a slideshow in your memory? There have been the most beautiful images of being alive and living life to the absolute fullest in those memory recaps. I try so hard to find those feelings again in the places where our footsteps stand firm, but it is a lifeless effort unless you are there. It is a hopeless curse on me.
I often forget the simple things; the way the guitar sounds on the side of town as the sun sets behind old buildings, or the view of bait meeting the water and causing an uproar of ripples as we fished on a hot afternoon. It's not that I want to forget at all, really. I just get so caught up in the things I don't want to forget that the "little things" seem to slip my mind, and to me - in the end - they are the most important. The little things in life are the things that matter the most to me, just like the little spark that turned into a flame with you.
It's unforgettable. Through the day, you're either in the back of my mind, or you're the only thing on my mind. There's no denying it, and I can't tell you that I'm sorry for that. I won't.
I can twist any song on the radio to remind me of something that relates to you. Any song from Lady GaGa to The Band can retell a story of the journey i've found myself on with you. It's been the journey of a lifetime. Take pride in the fact of knowing that you've been the main character in a chapter of my life. Whether or not I have to close the book to a new chapter is beyond me, but I'm enjoying adding to the story for now.
I just wanted you to know that you haven't died to me, and from as far as I can tell you won't any time soon. I do wish things were different every now and then, but at the same time - life couldn't be more perfect than it is. It is the most unperfected form of perfect, though. The understanding we have between the two of us is one that can't be explained by anyone aside from the two of us. There's no way to describe it, and you've taught me that it's okay to not have everything defined in life. Thank you for that.

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

quick post.

i have been savoring the last few days of Christmas break.

it seems like everyone else has gotten back into a routine, and just when I start thinking, "Ha ha ha - i don't have to yet!" .... BAM! Back to school.

i switched out my sock drawers today, and this is always a truly depressing time for me. I love socks. NOT white socks, of course. Christmas socks, Halloween socks, Valentines Day socks, ANY kind of holiday-ish socks...I want/need them. I wish Thanksgiving and Easter made socks. How fun would that be? I'm a tad crazy about socks. I have (for the past 3 years and counting) put socks on the top 5 things on my Christmas list. I never get festive socks for Christmas, always "anyday" cute socks, so that made switching out my drawers a little more bearable. It was still hard. Until next year, my friends. Sigh

i hope your New Years came in with a "BANG". Ours did. We had terrible weather that we insisted on staying out in, and honestly - it's fun to say that we weathered "a horrible tornado". Maybe that makes me crazy? I think it just makes me a tad adventurous with a side dose of rebellion..maybe?

as far as New Years resolutions go, I don't have one really set into stone like i did last year, and quite frankly - I think with the general public on the whole "New Years Resolution cliche" thing, but I think I mainly SET one to see if I can prove the people wrong who DON'T think I can do it.

that being said - the 2 (main) ones I am dealing with are: cutting (WAY WAY WAY) back on chocolate/sweets, and not using the straightener as much on my hair. I can't say that I will quit either cold turkey (like I did the sweet tea/caffeinated drinks), but having the mind set to try is always a good start. Right?

the other one that isn't such a huge deal, but then again it kind of is to me - bringing my blog back to the original reason for starting it. I was talking to Megan today about blogging, and I was telling her that I don't do a whole lot of "in depth - wonder who she's talking about" post much anymore. I enjoyed those simply because it was a stress reliever for me. I wouldn't do this all the time, of course. Only when I felt the need to vent or have a redheaded fit :) I just feel like I would lose interest in the people that now come to read my blog more often than when I had 5 or 10 "followers".
i guess this is the part where you tell me to "write what's on my heart" or "say what's on your mind", but sometimes you may NOT want me to do so. The truth still is that this is my blog, and the only problem with saying, "I will say what I want" is that anyone with access to the intriguing world of the WWW is subject to read it. Scary? Sometimes.

Lastly, I have read over the last years (maybe not all, but most) worth of posts, and I have noticed the UNREAL amount of times that I say "WE". If I do not mention other names anywhere beforehand, I am talking about We Three as in: Me, Megan, and Hollie. - now you know. :)

Highlights of Christmas break:

- late night road trips :)
- festive socks
- Strangebrew Coffeehouse
- Umi
- Megan coming home
- time with family
- hunting
- Realtree Roadtrips 6 & 7 :)
- Rockband with former classmates
- reminiscing
- (ashamed to admit it, but..) Lifetime Movie Network with Hollie & Anna until 3am
- new phone !!!!
- new movies
- dandy doodlez with my Aunt & cousins
- Local Culture
- ending a year & beginning a new one.

Happy New Year, again! 

Did you make resolutions? Do you have New Years Eve traditions?

Saturday, January 1, 2011

another year of pocketed memories..

January: I don't think anything MAJOR took place this month, but it started off the year that I was to graduate. Clint had a birthday in Virginia, and mailing gifts isn't as fun as personally giving them, just for the record. At the very end of January, he moved to Kings Bay - where he is today, still around 9ish hours away from here, but saying "Georgia" sounds closer than "Virginia".

February: A few of my classmates & I had the honor of being in the JA Charity Ball. I am by no means the dress up type, but it was neat to go & be a part of that with the classmates of mine who had parents that served in JA. Softball started, and it was freezing cold. I tried to remind myself that I would miss it, so being cold for a few hours a day wouldn't seem so bad. Sometimes it worked, other times - not so much. We attended the Dixie Nationals, and we saw Chris Young in concert. He was flawless. We saw Eric Church in Starkville, and we loved it so much!! 

March: Megan & I went to Luke Bryan in Starkville, and loved it too! We sold my truck, and it was an excitingly devastating time for me. I loved my truck. I considered it my "first vehicle", and so many memories were made in it. The interior of that truck holds more secrets than I could probably ever muster up the remembrance of. Baseball games started, and I was coming to a realization that this was the last time we (as upperclassmen) would be a part of these things. I can remember savoring those moments and squeezing all the details out of them. I'm so scared of forgetting things like the way I felt in a certain moment, the sound of the crowd cheering, the rush of emotions when a ball meets a bat, the crisp air meeting hot breath - causing a flood of smoke to exceed from your mouth, and the smell of sweet hot chocolate in the stands with a fleece blanket bundled up around you and two other friends. 
I also learned a few lessons in March about people who I thought needed to be in my life, and really - they didn't. I ended up hurting someone that I do/have love(d). Lessons will be learned either way, right? I just always seem to choose the hard way. Getting to know someone is fun initially, but once you've figured them out - and they're not a person who wants to change (when they SHOULD want to change), something has to happen. Walking away was the best option, but it was one I was stubborn about in the beginning. 

April: Easter - I wore a yellow dress. I would consider this a notable experience. I fixed my childhood best friend's sister's hair for her 8th grade banquet. I tagged along with Ashia to photograph a birthday party. I attended my last high school prom & gave a responsive speech (that I totally slaughtered). We had an amazing after party with a band, and we danced all night. The senior girls were honored at our last home slowpitch softball game. I went on an afternoon ride with my Daddy because he wanted to show me a place that he thought would be a perfect photograph. He talked to me about the days while he grew up. We had the perfect day, and the photograph he told me about? Just so happened to win my first (ever) photography competition. That photo is special to me, not only because of the beauty it holds - but because of the story it tells when I look at it. 

May: We threw Senior parties. We wrapped up sporting events. We ate crawfish. We reminisced on backroads. We stayed up way too late only to get up way too early. We rode four-wheelers down mainstreet and ate breakfast on the highway. We got stuck mud riding, and we danced on piers. We watched the sun go down & come back up. We lived. We loved. We laughed a lot. We were stars in a play. We went on a scavenger hunt. We had a tea party. We were high school Seniors, and we spent most ever minute together.
Most of all, a door was closed for me, a door of my past. It closed the door of relationships with 16 individuals that, for the most part, won't ever be the same. I won't see all of their smiling faces five days a week anymore. We won't argue with each other at the lunch table, or whisper behind the teachers backs during English class. We won't all understand inside jokes together, as a class. We - more than likely - won't all be in one room to laugh together or cry together again. We made so many memories over the course of 13 years. We lost a few people along the way, but we all held it together for each other during the good times and the bad times. From dusty overalls on the playground to caps & gowns in the gym - we were there for each other. From ratty ponytails & grass stains, we loved each other in a different way.  From skinned knees to our first broken hearts, we stood beside each other, held each others hand, and picked each other up from a fall. We weren't only a class, we were a family. We didn't have any other choice BUT to be a family. Small town, tight-knit communities demand it, and we were okay with that. We knew each others secrets, and they were safe among us. That's the way we were, and that's the way I'll always remember it. 

June: I went to the beach, and I got to take photos of the beginning of the Oil Spill. It was a humbling experience for me to see that with my own eyes and feel it under my own feet. I took engagement photos, and I relaxed & enjoyed my first month of summer other than being sick. I got sick the week after graduation, and I was sick until the third week in June. I went to the doctor 6 times, got 4 shots, and my finger was pricked so many times that you could confuse it with a pin cushion. The doctors couldn't figure out what was wrong. I would wake up at night to remind myself to breathe. My throat was swollen almost shut for weeks, and I was too tired to sleep. It was miserable. Finally, they wrote it off as mono. I had to consult my childhood Pediatrician to get that answer, but at that point - I was willing to do whatever to feel better. 

July: We went to the fair. We saw Clay Walker in concert in Jackson, and we spent the night there! Started a new tradition with my two best friends. We cook for whomever has a birthday, and we give gifts too. This is Hollie's birthday month, and we gathered at Megan's to celebrate. Megan brought home my niece, Kenlee, and we spent a day in Crawford fishing & riding the golf carts around dirt roads   - just like we did when we were kids. It was an amazing month. Relaxing and memorable. Clint came home, and I ate lunch with he & his family for the Fourth of July!

August: We started college. It wasn't as life changing as I had maybe anticipated, but it definitely is no comparison to high school. There is no drama. It's "come and go". I think it's more relaxed than high school, or right now it is anyway! I turned 19 years old. I had tickets to see the Eli Young Band (aka: my most favorite music other than -theOneAndOnly Garth Brooks...melt my heart) & plans fell through because of an Ambassador meeting we had to attend. I was devastated. The concert was ON MY BIRTHDAY. It was fate. Or so I thought. 

September: Megan came right up behind me & turned 19 as well. We went to our Starkville concert to see Corey Smith, but he took forever to play, so we left. I photographed my first wedding (with some help, of course). Baby A turned ONE! Clint came home for a leave, and we had dinner at our local Mexican restaurant.

October: We went to countless football games - home & away. We loved traveling together to see the boys play, as well as watching them play once we got there. I started a 30 Day Blog Challenge, and I firmly believe that it enhanced my "want" to blog. I realized that there are people who care about my boring life (ha), and I am thankful for those of you who read my ramblings! I killed my first deer with a bow. I had a photoshoot with my precious Marlee, and last - but definitely not least - our church was able to provide our Honduras family with a new vehicle for them to allow their mission work to be a tad bit easier in their rural area. It was a sweet thing to watch unfold.

November: I went on the most amazing trip I have ever been on. I experienced drastic weather changes, beautiful snow filled atmospheres, a plane ride (or 6), and I was given the opportunity to kill a deer through all of that. I saw more things, animals mainly, there then i've ever seen in my life. My eyes were opened to an entirely different, yet almost the same lifestyle. The passion for hunting is the same for all people, and even if you come from totally different parts of the country - if you love to hunt, you can pretty much get along on that common ground. I missed Thanksgiving day with my family (aside from Daddy) for the first time in 19 years. They made it up to us once we got home :)

December: Relationships rekindled as always. I wrapped up my first semester in college with a 4.0. I stayed up too late. I watched Lifetime Movie Network for more hours than I want to admit. I took so many photos over the course of the last 5 months, and I wrapped that all up. I spent a week away from one of my best friends while she skied in West Virginia. I had an amazing Christmas with my sweet family. I made promises to myself that are harder than I thought to keep. I had fun, and I did everything feeling free & alive. I spent the last night of the year with my favorite people, and some of those I graduated with. It's always fun for us to be under the same roof together. I weathered a tornado (literally) with my two best friends, and we made it home alive. :) The Lord had His hand on us, and my poor Mamma was a basketcase. December 31, 2010 marked the 365 day mark for my "Only Water" resolution, and I stuck with it the entire time. Thank you to all who have encouraged me! Clint came home, and we got to catch up on the last few months!


2010: has been one of THE MOST memorable years of my life. My heart has been mended & broken in  a year. My life has moved forward in the direction of my future. I realized that people you THINK you can trust are not always trustworthy, but the people who are will trust you the same. I've learned that no matter what, I'm going to always do what I want and follow my heart and gut feeling. I am beginning to put into perspective just how important the time with my family & friends really is because time is limited. Time is not a gift that can be given BACK. It can only be taken away. 2010 has been a landmark year in my life, and I can't wait to see what the future holds in 2011. 
To read last years recap, click here. 
Happy New Year